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Glee: Laryngitis

Artie:  I'm kinda getting cold feet, here.
Brittany:  Can you even feel your feet?

Spoiler Alert

After some pretty drama-heavy episodes, last night we got a nice, light-hearted episode that really didn't advance any story lines.  It made me smile a lot, and laugh a little too.  We did find out where Quinn was living (Puck's, after all--that was anticlimactic), and we also found out that Quinn and Puck aren't tied together so tightly after all, which is a big relief to me.  Overall, just a good solid episode--if last week was a turning point, you might call this one a placeholder.

So here's what happened on Glee...

We begin with a close-up of a head being shaved and then the POV shot from that head in the hallways of WMHS and then the practice room, everyone staring.  Then, we see it who it is.  It's Puck, and his mohawk is gone.  Cut to Puck and Santana talking, and Puck is telling Satana that his mom found a mole on his head while washing his hair.  After the insult about his mom washing his hair, he tells her that he had to go see a dermatologist about the mole because his mom thought it was cancer.  The doctor shaved his head, and now he's lost all his mojo.  People actually look him in the eye now.  He gets no sympathy from Santana.

After his talk with Santana, he's walking to the parking lot where he meets Jacob Ben Israel (JewFro) who tells him that because he's lost his mohawk, he and his friends aren't intimidated anymore.  In fact, they're out for revenge.  He takes it as if it's just the natural order of things, and a couple of nerds pick him and throw him in the dumpster.  Lying in the dumpster, he reevaluates his life...well, not really.  He just tries to figure out how he can his social status back until his mohawk returns.  Then, he remembers Mercedes.  She's now the most popular girl in school (apparently) because she joined the Cheerios.  He definitely doesn't want to join the Cheerios, but he realizes dating one is just as good.  He decides he needs to date Mercedes (or "Black Girl from Glee Club whose name I can't remember right now").

In the practice room, Rachel is pulling out a bunch of what look like over-the-counter medicine bottles.  They're actually vitamin supplements.  Mr. Schue is there, and he asks her what they are and why she's taking them.  She says she's exhausted, and she even had a tickle in her throat.  It's because she's always singing solos, which is interesting because she always complains when she doesn't get a solo.  She's leading up to something, and that something is that she enlisted the help of the AV club to bug the practice room to see if what she suspected was true:  that some of her fellow glee-clubbers were not singing.  It was true.

Here's the list of people who weren't singing:

1.  Finn Hudson
2.  Quinn Fabray
3.  Santana Lopez
4.  Noah Puckerman
5.  Brittany

Cut to Puck sauntering up to Mercedes to charm her into thinking he wants to date her, or at least make out.  She rejects him.  He's just making a fool out of himself telling her that Quinn knows she can't keep him down.  "You're Top 40; I'm Rhythm & Blues," she says.

Back in the practice room, Mr. Schue is upset.  He lectures the gleeks about not pulling their weight.  He asks Finn why he stopped singing, and he says it's because his confidence was shaken because Jesse was getting all the leads (oh, and BTW, Jesse is mysteriously missing).  Santana says her job is just to look hot (which she usually does especially when she's not wearing her pony tail, IMO).  Quinn says her baby hormones are making her moody.  Brittany:  "There are so many lyrics."  Will's solution is to have everyone to pick a song that represents who they are and sing a solo.  Kurt's excited, and Rachel is pleased.

In the hall after practice, Kurt meets his father who is there to take Finn to a Reds game.  Kurt asks why he wasn't invited, and Burt says it's because every time he watches a game, all Kurt talks about his what a travesty it is that the players are all wearing stirrup pants "because there's never an excuse for stirrup pants."  Kurt is alarmed, but a plan begins to form.

At the next New Directions meeting, Puck tries again with Mercedes:  "Girl, you've got more curves than the Nissan ad."  Strike two (thought I'd continue with the baseball theme).

Will tries to start things off, but Rachel quickly takes control.  She wants to sing her song first.  I can tell you exactly what I was thinking during this little scene.  Rachel began, "I have chosen Miley Cyrus's 'The Climb'," and I thought, "Really?"  She finished her explanation, and then she began singing, and I thought "Oh...ok."  I would've actually voice these thoughts if there's anyone in the room with me.  She started singing, and she was terrible.  Now, I don't know if this was supposed to be a knock on Miley Cyrus or if they really were just throwing a bone to the Miley Cyrus out there.  But, I really didn't think her music fit the audience for Glee, or at least the kind of music they had done before.

As she was singing, the gleeks and Will had a mixture of disbelief and embarrassment on their faces.  It was almost as if they didn't really trust their ears, like they weren't hearing it right.  Of course, Brittany looked like she was enjoying the song.  Rachel only barely started to realize something was off, and finally, Will stopped her and told her there was something wrong--cue the impending doom music.

Commercial break

Sue confronts Kurt at his locker for not showing up at Cheerios practice the day before.  Kurt opens up to her about his dad and how he thinks he's losing him because he's gay.  Sue insults him and tells him there's only one person who can tell him who he is...Sue Sylvester, and she hasn't decided who he is.  He decides to use his glee club assignment to help him figure out who he is, but she's not interested.  Back in his bedroom, his father comes down to find him in a hunting outfit.  Kurt says he's practicing for his assignment, a John Mellencamp song.  "I think it's really brave for a midwesterner like himself to write a song about such bold interior design."  His father is not fooled, but he wants to be so he agrees to go with Kurt to get burgers and talk about Mellencamp even though every Mellencamp song is about the same thing.

At the doctor's office, Rachel is freaking out.  Finn is there (where's at least one of her "two gay dads"?).  She thinks she's nothing without her voice, and Finn says there are "so many awesome things about you."  But when Rachel pushes him to tell her what they are, he just assures her that the doctor is not going to tell her she'll never sing again.  Of course, the doctor comes in and says she'll never sing again.  He's joking, but she does have tonsillitis.  He recommends she have her tonsils removed, but she doesn't want him to butcher her.  He convinces her to at least try antibiotics "unless you think they're going to adversely affect your dance moves."  She asks Finn what she should do.  He says, "Maybe you should ask your boyfriend...oh wait, he's not here."  He's in San Diego with his friends from Vocal Adrenaline, apparently.  Finn again tries to make her see that Jesse doesn't really like her like Finn does, and Rachel defends him by saying that even though they haven't spoken since the "'Run, Joey, Run' debacle," he really does like her.  And, she likes him.

This is, I'm sure, how Jesse got his name.  They producers wanted to Finn to sing "Jesse's Girl" to try to get her back, and so they named him Jesse.  Finn uses the assignment to vent his frustration over losing Rachel to Jesse.  Rachel is flattered but defiant.  Puck's up next, and he sings brings in the jazz band to sing  the black and jewish Sammy Davis Jr.'s "The Lady is a Tramp" to try to win Mercedes over by showing he can act black or something.  I didn't really get it.  But I liked the song, and Mercedes joined in and finally gave in to him.  Everyone enjoys it, but Santana looks mad.

Commercial break

Mercedes is walking the halls enjoying her popularity, but her mood drops when she sees Quinn leaning against her locker waiting for her.  She steels herself, ready for the tirade about stealing Quinn's boyfriend.  It doesn't come.  Instead, Quinn tells her she's okay with it, but she makes sure Mercedes realizes Puck is just using her.  Mercedes knows.  Quinn also tells her she's worried Santana might hut her physically.

Kurt, in his hunting jacket and cap, volunteers to sing his song.  He's speaking in a vaguely southern masculine voice, and he sings in as low and husky a voice as he can muster.  Everyone is very concerned, except Brittany, who's oblivious.  Will tells Kurt he needs to himself.  Kurt says he's "not a box."  Brittany tells Kurt to let her know if he wants to make out with her because she's made out with all the other boys in the school except him because she thought he was "capital g gay."  He can't believe his luck.  He's going to do it.

Rachel is roaming the halls in pajamas and a long sweater with messed-up hair.  She's looks downright frumpy.  She's also eating Cheerios, the cereal not the people.  Finn asks her what's going on, and she says she's been losing sleep and after three days the antibiotics haven't helped.  She says her life is over, and Finn calls her out on her drama.  He tells her he's going to take her to see someone.  "Not another doctor...I've seen six already."  No, it's an old friend.

Commercial break

In Kurt's bedroom, Brittany is trying to make out with Kurt.  She puts her hand on his hip.  He bats it away.  He remarks that her lip gloss tastes like root beer and asks what boys' lips taste like.  She says dip or burgers or her armpits.  Burt walks in.  He's holding a doorknob hanger that says "Do not enter under any circumstances.  I'm making out with a girl."  Burt didn't think it was real so he didn't take it seriously.  Of course, Kurt wanted to get caught by his dad even though he pretended to be offended by his dad's invasion of his privacy.  In private, Burt asks him what's going on.  Kurt tells him they have more in common than he thought, including "the ladies."  Burt, again, wants to believe him so he lets them continue.  He tells Brittany it was nice to meet her even though, if you recall, he met her once before when Kurt was doing the "Single Ladies" dance in his room that one time.

At Mercedes' locker, Puck is extolling the virtues of Super Mario Brothers 3, and Mercedes stops him.  Quinn had warned him of this.  She tells him that "sistas" have needs, the first of which is for him to stop talking about video games and learn about her.  Secondly, she needs an frozen coffee drink.  As he walks away, he catches JewFro not looking at him again.  He throws him against the lockers and demands he tell him what's happening.  It turns out, Puck's plan has worked.  He has his reputation back.  Some of the guys who threw him in the dumpster even transferred out of fear of retaliation.  After he tells JewFro to get Mercedes' coffee drink, he walks away happy, and Santana gives him a flirty look.  He's back.

Mercedes notices Santana's look, and they start singing the Brandy and Monica duet, "That Boy Is Mine."  This is their song for the assignment, apparently.  They would have gotten in a fight if Mr. Schue hadn't separated them.  I don't think Santana really wants Puck.  She just doesn't want anyone else to have him.  I think she let Quinn have him because of the baby thing and maybe she's afraid of her still, but she was not going to let Mercedes have him.

Commercial break

Outside, the nerds are all lined up waiting for their turn to be thrown in the dumpster by Puck's lackeys.  Mercedes confronts him, and he just says it's the way things should be.  They need to be afraid of those higher then them on the social ladder because without it there would be chaos.

Finn and Rachel ring the doorbell at Finn's friend's house.  A woman ushers them into a bedroom where a kid about their age is lying in a hospital bed.  Finn and Shawn met at football camp.  Shawn was injured soon after, and now he's paralyzed from the upper chest down.  After the usual uncomfortable jokes about him having a shot with Rachel, he tells Rachel that he once felt about football the way she feels about her voice, that if he couldn't play he wasn't worth anything.  He's still miserable and working through it, but he's discovered he's more than a football player.  For instance, he's good at math, and he can sing.  She's duly touched.

Back at school, Puck discovers Mercedes has quit the Cheerios.  She realized she's not the kind of person who would be a cheerleader to be popular.  She doesn't like that she could be someone who could like a boy who throws people in the dumpster.

Kurt and Brittany are walking down the hall holding hands.  Brittany thinks this is what dating a baby is like because Kurt's hand feels like a baby's.  Burt is there again, this time to take Finn for hoagies that he won for catching a foul ball at the game.  Kurt asks Brittany to leave them alone, and Kurt again asks his dad why he didn't invite him.  Kurt is angry.  He sings again, this time "Rose's Turn" from Gypsy, an angry song about abandonment and empowerment.  He changed some of the lyrics to fit his situation.  He's back, too.

After the song, Burt finds him on the stage and tells him that he decided to spend time with him instead.  He tells him that he should just be who he is.  Kurt tells him he's been trying to making him happy and that his dad has been acting disappointed in him, and Burt says he's right.  He should have been more supportive, but it was hard because Kurt didn't turn out like he expected.  He promises to do better if Kurt will stop playing the victim and just be himself.

Back at Shawn's house, Rachel has shown up to thank him again for helping her see that she was more than her voice.  She offers to give him singing lessons in return.  She found a mircle cure for her tonsillitis:  "a heroic dose of antibiotics and a mysterious blend of herbal remedies and a vow of silence."  He suggests they start with the lessons right then.  He tells her to come to the bed and take his hand.  He doesn't feel it, but he remembers what it's like.  The two scenes with Shawn here reminded me, once again,  that Lea Michele is also not just a major singing talent.  She can't act, too (she was one of two cast members nominated for Golden Globes for acting).  They sing U2's "One," which they call classic rock.  This makes me feel old, because it's from 1992, the year I graduated from high school.  It's a song about living a life that counts because it's the only you have, which goes along with the theme for the episode.  She also sings it with New Directions.  The episode ends with the two of them finishing the song, quietly with a single tear running down Rachel's cheek.

There were very few Sue moments in this episode so I decided to a Brittany quote recap instead.

Favorite Brittany Lines:
About Puck without his mohawkWho was that guy?

During the make out session:  Kissing my armpits is a really big turn on for me.

Burt:  ...If things get serious, use protection.
BrittanyDoes he mean like a burglar alarm? (favorite line)


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Not that I don't think she is hilarious, but I for one was glad to have a little less Sue Sylvester this week. Liked this episode a whole lot better than the last couple!

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