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Glee: Home

Spoiler Alert!

I knew it would happen someday, but I wasn't really prepared for it when it did.  Rachel Berry was almost completely absent from last night's episode.  She didn't have a single solo, and the two numbers she participated in featured other soloists.  I'm not suggesting it didn't make any sense at all, but it was strange (all the more because most of her screen time was spent wrapped in Jesse's arms).  On the other hand, Quinn did finally have a substantive role in this episode.  Not all questions about her were answered, but at least we found out some of what's going on in her head.  This was in my opinion the weakest episode since the show's return, mostly due to the return of April Rhodes, but I know not everyone will agree.  It was still pretty good.

So, here's what you missed on Glee.

As seems to be a pattern, Sue Sylvester opens the show, this time with a warning to Mercedes, with Kurt by her side, to lose 10 pounds in a week and be wearing a "gender-appropriate" Cheerios uniform or she's off the team.

After the title screen, we see Will storming into the teacher's lounge demanding Sue tell him why the auditorium is padlocked.  She informs him that she has signed up (using the sign-up sheet she carries in her pocket) to use the auditorium for Cheerios practice because it's too cold to practice outside.  A magazine reporter is coming to feature Sue and the Cheerios.  Figgins is allowing it because Sue is blackmailing him.  Cut to the practice room where Will informs the glee club of the problem but that he will find somewhere for them to practice.  Puck suggests they torch the auditorium, and Rachel suggests a sit-in, but Will calls them off.

When they disband, Kurt catches Finn and asks him for his opinion on what color he should use to decorate his room.  He's looking for a "hunting lodge meets Tom Ford's place in Bel-Air" look.  He's asking Finn to help him with the hunting lodge color.  Finn looks uncomfortable and confused, "I live in a closet...there's cowboy wallpaper on the walls", but he points one out anyway.  When Kurt starts spouting some fabric jargon, Finn decides he's had enough of the conversation and walks away.  Kurt seems encouraged.

In the cafeteria, Kurt implores Mercedes to eat even less than her healthy chicken breast with salad.  Mercedes is discouraged and asks Brittany and Santana (Brittana) how they stay skinny.  They tell her of "The Sue Sylvester's Master Cleanse, "water, maple syrup, for glucose, lemon, for acid, cayenne pepper, to irritate the bowels, and a dash of ipecac, a vomiting agent."  They convince her that it's the only way for her to stay on the team.  Quinn is looking on, very worried.

Movers are carrying Finn's mother's bed out.  She's selling everything that reminds her of her late husband.  Finn's not happy.  He convinces her not to sell any more, but she tells him she's in love--with Kurt's father.

Will is at a local roller skating rink (yes roller skating) to see if he can rent it out for the club to practice.  He runs into April Rhodes (Kristin Chenoweth) and finds out she got sidetracked and ended up mistress to a wealthy .  She owns the rink; apparently, she got the money to buy it from her sugar daddy, a strip mall magnate.  Before he finds all this out, though, she embarrasses him by announcing to the whole rink that she just had a sex dream about him.  Of course, they sing, and he's nostalgic but disappointed.  She offers to let them use the roller rink to practice, and he tells her he's looking for a "sublettor" because of the divorce.  She jumps at the chance to latch on to him again.

Commercial break

We return to Sue's office where she is weighing her cheerleaders.  She's encouraging to Becky, "Instead of being different and an outcast you're just like every other teenage girl in America, sadly obsessed with vanity."  She lost two pounds.  Unfortunately, Mercedes gained two pounds.  Sue renews her threat.  At school, Finn asks Kurt when they started dating, and Kurt informs him that he brought them together at a Parent Teacher conference.  They bond over acid-wash denim.  Kurt's all for it, but Finn's not happy.  Finn angrily tells a disappointed Kurt that he does not want their parents to merge their families together.

Kurt is clearly trying to get Finn fall in love with him so in the practice room when the gleeks aren't happy that they have to practice in a roller rink, Kurt says they need to find their sense of home within.  He demonstrates with a song, a sort of duet in which he's clearly trying to convince Finn that it'll be a good thing to share a home, and a room, with him (plus they'll live happily ever after).  Several of the glee clubbers are uncomfortable, probably because they don't get why Kurt is singing a solo when he hasn't since the "Defying Gravity" disaster.  Will is thinking, and Brittana are moved.  They link pinkies, and Santana rests her head on Brittany's shoulder.

Commercial break

April appears at Will's door expecting to stay the night to see if she really wants to stay there.  She convinces him it'll be ok, but he tells her she has to stay on the couch.  And, the liquor cabinet is off limits, which she's okay with because she brought her own.  She puts on some soft music and starts to sing.  Will is drawn in, and they end up singing together and in the same bed.  But, they only sleep.

Cut to the Hummels and the Hudsons at the same restaurant Finn had his strange date with Brittana.  Kurt is initially enthusiastic, and Finn is obviously not happy about being there.  But, Burt Hummel bonds with Finn over football, and Kurt begins to re-think his position on their new situation.  He starts to think Finn is the son his father always wanted.  Back home, Kurt confronts his father, and his father tries his hardest to convince Kurt that he loves him.  He's unconvinced:  "I'm a guy."  Burt tells Kurt he just wants to be happy, and isn't that why Kurt set them up in the first place?

In the cafeteria, Artie and Tina try to convince Mercedes she doesn't need to kill herself to lose weight.  She gets angry, clearly because she's hungry because when she looks around the kids in the cafeteria all look like food.  As she stands to leave, she gets lightheaded and faints.

Commercial break

In her office, the school nurse tells Mercedes that she has low blood pressure and that her mother is on her way to pick her up.  When the nurse leaves to get Mercedes ginger ale, Quinn walks up and offers Mercedes a granola bar.  This is Quinn's first major scene since the hiatus, and it's a really great one, I think.  We finally see a completely unselfish Quinn.  We saw glimpses in previous episodes, when she realized the glee club were her real friends and she shouldn't tear them down, but she always still seemed to crave her social status and sense of inferiority.  In this scene, she tells Mercedes she's beautiful just the way she is and when Mercedes questions why she's being nice to her, she says she's learned it's not worth risking your health just to be thin.  Amber Riley (Mercedes) and Dianna Agron (Quinn) are really good in this scene.

Cut to the roller rink where the gleeks are trying unsuccessfully to skate, and Will and April are having a heart-to-heart.  Will tells April she needs to find another place to live,  He tries to tell her she deserves more than to be someone's mistress and drink herself to death.  She seems to take it to heart, again, and tells him she's going to try to straighten up, again.  The roller rink is not profitable anyway; so, she decides to sell it and break up with her boyfriend.

Kurt meets Finn in the hall and tells him he now agrees they need to break their parents up.  Finn, in a rare perceptive moment, tells Kurt he understands it hurt that he bonded with his father.  They agree to "put an end to them."  Finn does his part by telling his mother he's going to flush his dad's ashes.  He's bluffing, of course, but his mother calls his bluff.  She tells Finn they've been pretending they were still a complete family.  She says she's in love with Burt, and they need to move on.  She says she's been holding on to her late husband too long, and Finn never really knew him.

Commercial Break

Sue meets Tracy, the reporter who turns about to be a man, in the gym where they're waiting for a performance by the Cheerios.  They keep waiting, for Mercedes, and when she finally appears she makes a speech about everyone needing to be happy with themselves just the way they are.  She sings, and the gleeks join her with Quinn leading the way with a look that dares the others to follow.  Kurt apologizes for his part in making her feel bad, and Sue is chastised and not happy about it.  The message of this scene was a good one, and I think the teenagers in the viewing audience needed to see it.  But, I think it could have been a little less sickeningly sweet.  Maybe the speech was good, but they could have chosen a different song or not sung at all.

Commercial Break

Back in Sue's office, the reporter tells Sue he was pleasantly surprised.  He had expected to expose her as a "coward and a cheat" who only cared about herself.  Instead, she was teaching her cheerios that they didn't have to thin and popular to be worth something.  She takes the wholly undeserved credit he's giving her, even though she clearly doesn't like it.

Finn finds Burt Hummel in his kitchen, and he starts to confront him.  Burt stops him and puts him at ease.  He says he doesn't intend to replace his father, but he loves his mom and will help her move forward.  They bond again over sports (Finn offers his dad's chair to Burt), and Kurt is in the background still not happy.  It'll be very interesting to see how this plays out.  Kurt has been in love with Finn for awhile, but the prospect of Finn replacing him in his father's eyes has to be very difficult.

In the practice room, April is telling Will that her sugar daddy died when he gave him an ultimatum, and she inherited $2 million because his wife wanted to keep her quiet.  She's moving to New York City to try to make it on Broadway with the first ever all-white production of The Wiz.  The glee club enters, and April announces she has bought the auditorium (The April Rhodes Civic Pavilion) for New Directions, and the glee club thanks her by letting her sing with them.

The End

Musical Numbers
"A House Is Not a Home" written by Burt Bacharach and Hal David originally recorded by Dionne Warwick--Chris Colfer (Kurt) does a really good job with this I think, and so does Cory Monteith (Finn).  Cory doesn't usually do so well with really high notes, and Kurt gets to prove he can sing.

"Fire" by Bruce Springsteen--In my opinion, April Rhodes is the weakest guest character so far, but I love Kristin Chenoweth.  She and Matthew Morrison also sound great together, and this number is no exception.  Will is drawn in by April's charms once more.

"One Less Bell to Answer"/"A House Is Not a Home" written by Bacharach and David--Will and April again sing a very nice duet.  Will gets sucked in a little more.

"Beautiful" originally recorded by Christina Aguilera--While I thought this number was overly sappy, Amber Riley (Mercedes) sang it really well.

"Home" from The Wiz--I thought this was a really beautiful performance.  Kristin Chenoweth, again, is a huge talent.  I was a little disappointed the first I heard this that Lea Michele (Rachel) didn't join her somewhere along the line, but it was originally a solo.  And, Ms. Chenoweth deserves at least one of those.

Favorite Sue Sylvester Lines
Mercedes, your vocal chords have had more fantastic runs than a Kenyan track team, but that look simply will not doAt first I thought it was a subtle homage to yours truly, but now I fear it's some sort of ironic comment.

To Kurt and MercedesHow do you two not have a show on Bravo?

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to put in a call to the Ohio Secretary of State notifying them I will no longer be carrying photo ID
.  You know whyPeople should know who I am.

To Will:  Oh, I'm sure Figgins will just mumble something nervously and then pretend to take a phone callI happen to be blackmailing him.

I haven't had a solid meal since 1987.

To BeckyHey, before you know it, you'll be leaving little baggies of upchuck in your parent's linen closetCongratsI'm proud of ya, kid.

To MercedesWell, you might try dropping the attitudeI'm sure there's a pound or two in that.

With a name like Tracy, I assumed you were a lady.

Yeah, on assembly days, I arrange for the rest of the school to be fumigated, leaving the gymnasium the only place with breathable airOh, come oneThat was cleverYou might wanna start writing down my little bon motsI'm gonna be droppin' some beauties on ya.

During Mercedes' speechStill building the tension.

After Pendergrast commends herWell, thank you, uh, Mr. Pendergrast, I can't say I'm surprisedUm, you know, I work so hard to get my girls feeling good about themselves because it's what's inside that counts.

Favorite Line
BrittanyI'm pretty sure my cat's been reading my diary.

Honorable Mention
Sometimes, I add a teaspoon of sand.